My Love, There is Nothing Wrong with YouSep 11, 2021
When I woke up this morning, I felt called to write these words:
There is nothing wrong with you.
I remember the horrible feeling that something--everything!--was wrong with me.
For years I felt broken, damaged, and that nothing would ever be able to "fix" me.
I felt like no one could help me or make me better.
No one could save me from the pain that I'd faced.
I couldn't help but think that my emotional wounds would be exposed to the world forever.
And honestly, it made it really hard to keep going on some days.
When we go through significant trauma and face extreme emotional pain, we internalize messages about how we are bad, unlovable, and broken.
We beat ourselves up for past mistakes, and we think that if we ever want to feel better, we have to change everything about ourselves.
We feel like we have to hide or "fix" the parts of ourselves that are difficult to face.
Or we feel like we need to entirely get rid of the parts of ourselves that have been deeply wounded.
But what if we chose to view these "broken" parts of ourselves differently?
How can we view these fragmented pieces as part of a bigger picture?
In Japan, there is an art form called Kintsugi, which means "to repair with gold."
After a bowl or teacup breaks, an artist puts it back together by highlighting the cracks and imperfections with gold. Rather than throwing a broken item away, the object is transformed into a more unique, precious, and valuable piece by celebrating its breakage.
What if we chose to celebrate our own life's breakage in the same way that the Kintsugi technique celebrates it?
We would no longer view the broken pieces as parts of ourselves that need fixing, but as cracks that can be transformed into beauty with enough care and intention.
It's completely valid to feel like we will never be repaired back to "normal" after traumatic experiences.
But the fact of the matter is: you are not broken.
You are strong.
You have survived a lot of pain and a lot of tragedy.
And those moments of pain and trauma can become parts of your story that create even more strength and uniqueness in the person you are today.
So, my dear soul, the next time you start questioning your worth, remember that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you.
You are simply walking through this life, embarking on this journey of healing, one day at a time.
And you are putting those broken pieces back together again.
One day, all of those parts of you that you thought were irreparable will be filled with gold.
Let them be a gentle reminder that you have persisted through the breakage and transformed into something even more beautiful.
Make sure to give yourself some love today.
Be gentle with yourself.
Remember that you are perfect exactly as you are.
And remind yourself that there is nothing--absolutely nothing--about you that needs fixing.
Want to create healthy, safe, & loving intimate relationships after trauma?
Take this Trauma-Informed Relationship Assessment!
Download the FREE Trauma-Informed Relationships Assessment to discover the 5 different areas that past trauma has impacted your intimate relationships.
We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.